R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Thoughts for R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Women

“We grow forward when the delights of growth and the anxieties of safety are greater than the anxieties of growth and the delights of safety.” Abraham Maslow

Growth and safety are usually at odds with each other. During the earliest stages of a midlife divorce we crave safety. We are worried we can’t survive on our own. We are anxious about being alone and we fret about whether our children will still like us or we’ll ever have another companion to share life with. We just want to feel safe and secure again. But growth rarely happens in a cocoon of safety. All heroes have to step off the well-mowed path to slay dragons, navigate through dark woods and risk life and limb for the worthy cause or the well-deserved treasure. All growth is accompanied by anxiety. All adventure contains uncertainty and being called on to do more than we ever expected of ourselves. Growth is not just unsettling; it makes us step out into downright horrifying, dangerous territory. We conquer one demon and an ogre shows up. Even though we are bloody and bruised, we pull out our sword and fight on. Each morning we re-buckle on our armor, encourage compatriots to join us gaining courage and determination as we go. On the way we become more than we ever thought possible …. not in spite of the journey, but because of it. When you think about it, safety is pretty dull. Growth is adventure and embraces the delights of living to the fullest. Growth means living on the edge. Growth means celebrating the victory over a commonplace, unintentional life. Our divorce yanks us out of our safe existence and into a wildly exciting adventure to claim our own bright future. It’s a magnificent treasure with our name on it. It’s been promised to us, so let’s go get it! No amount of safety can compare with that.

“Turn all your anxiety over to God because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 (GWT)