R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Thoughts for R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Women

Life is full of change. Some change we consider good. Some we consider bad. Marriage. Children. Work. Midlife Divorce. Death of a loved one. Move to a new environment. I’ve decided that the key to life is learning to deal with change, because life is by definition, change. We can refuse to change and stay angry and mad or sad because we must change. Or we can accept the changes that must be made in the best way possible. My mom died about three weeks ago. She lived a rich, full, vibrant life that left me with memories and lessons that will always be a part of me. But her death has brought change to all of the family, especially my dad. He is 90. He has been with my mom almost 67 years. The change facing him is cataclysmic. I have been in Wichita with him, helping to figure out his next step. He said at the kitchen table the other night, “I have known this adjustment was coming. I know my life is going to be radically changed. Sometimes I’m excited about it, sometimes I’m nervous, and sometimes I dread it.” Don’t we all feel like that about most change in our lives? My brother, Grant, preached a sermon yesterday about our Mission, Our Message and our Motivation as people of God. When we have a mission in life, change is easier. My dad feels that he still has people he can encourage at this new place. In fact, when we went to visit, we looked at an apartment that was occupied by another 90-year-old man, a career military man who had lost his wife in June. My Dad can encourage him. My brother mentioned that it’s not an accident that Dad is going to this place. God still has a mission for him and a message for him to deliver. That’s how I grew to feel about my midlife divorce recovery mission. I think because I have been on this road, I can share things I’ve learned with women just starting out. I can use this change to help others. All of us can use this change to clarify our purpose here on earth. And by having a purpose that is truly worthy of our time, energy and resources, joy and fulfillment and contentment will find us on their own. When change encourages us to find new ways to express God’s love and our concern for others, we will be rewarded with a life “beyond our wildest dreams.” That’s a promise. In my life it’s been true. It will be true in my Dad’s new phase of life. It will be true in yours as well.