R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Thoughts

“During these difficult transition times, you have to begin again to define clearly who you really are.” ~ Sheldon Kopp in Blues Ain’t Nothing But a Good Soul Feeling Bad – Daily Steps to Spiritual Growth

Life transitions are challenging. They require a redefinition of who we are. We become a mother and that means redefining ourselves to incorporate our new responsibilities. When a last child leaves home for college or for his or her own independent life, we have to readjust. When we go through menopause, we have to look up and see what that means to the reality of who we are. When we suffer the loss of life as we know it because of divorce, we are called upon to incorporate literally hundreds of changes into our day-to-day existence. I truly believe a midlife divorce that we didn’t want is the biggest challenge we will ever have to face. And though you can’t see it at first, it may be an unexpected opportunity for good as well. Your life right now is a big giant tornado of change all in one seemingly horrific disaster … your divorce. But because it is so all encompassing, it gives you an incredible chance to re-evaluate … to rebuild. Picture your house being totally destroyed with absolutely everything you hold dear gone and that is close to what you are facing. You have two choices after you sit in the rubble and moan and cry and sob for a while. You can stay in the ruins and whine and complain and be an eternal victim. Or you can rebuild. You can start to look at books with houseplans. You can cut pictures out of magazines of rooms you like and colors you identify with and spaces you might enjoy. You start thinking about what kind of house you want now. You can do that with your life as well. Grieve. Cry. Mourn. Then slowly start thinking about your new life. You are a child of God. You have choices. God has a plan for you. Don’t sit in the trash pile. Get up! See what God can do with that amazing person he created and who may just now have an opportunity to shine like never before.

“Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:12