R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Thoughts
"Depression is the inability to construct a future."
Rollo May, psychologist, author of Love and Will
Every year we hear about depression and the holidays. And you think ... "I have reason to be depressed this holiday season. I'm getting a divorce or I just got a divorce. How can I be anything BUT depressed?" I did an hour-long interview this morning on the subject of "Surviving the Holidays While You're Surviving Divorce." I know that the holidays, even in the best of times and the best of families, cause stress and anxiety. Sometimes they cause major stress and anxiety. Add the upheaval and sadness and chaos of a divorce to the mix and you have the potential for depression. You wonder if you will ever get any better. During my midlife divorce I don't know if I was clinically depressed or not, but there were times that I cried all day. Days I didn't want to get out of bed. Days when I couldn't eat and nights when I couldn't sleep. And then in the middle of all of that you are expected to "smile and do the holidays." Those first few transition years you just have to muddle through the best you can. Here are some tips: Be patient with yourself. Simplify. Be flexible. Focus on others. It's not about stuff. Don't postpone joy. ~ The holidays are not always going to feel like this. They will get better. You do have a future and not just a so-so future, but a future that is unexpectedly good. Better than you can even imagine right now. During the rest of this year, take care of yourself and take care of your loved ones and reach out to those you don't know. The holidays are not about you. They are about what God has done for all of us. He gives us much to be thankful for, and He is near when we are hurting and in pain. Understand that you will survive this and that there is a future for you. A future that is worth celebrating.
"The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
Psalms 34:18 (NIV)
Go to www.radicalwomennetwork.com and download the 101 RADICAL Helps for the Holidays
