R.A.D.I.C.A.L. Thoughts

"Big people monopolize the listening. Small people monopolize the talking."
The Magic of Thinking Big - David J. Schwartz

Sometimes when I don't know what to say, I talk. During my divorce, I used to think that if I just said the right thing I could convince my ex-husband that what he was doing was craziness. I used to write letters and call on the phone and send messages thinking that if I could just get him to understand, he would come to his senses. I think we need to stand up and talk when we need to. We need to be confident enough to make our point of view heard. But, I have grown to put much more stock in listening than in talking. I've discovered that sometimes the less you say, the more people listen. Think about it. Don't you often cringe when the resident conversation monopolizer gets started, but you tend to listen closely to the wise person who is frugal with his or her words? Dr. Schwartz also made this statement, "In hundreds of interviews with people at all levels I've made this discovery: The bigger the person, the more apt he is to encourage you to talk; the smaller the person, the more apt he is to preach to you ..." Do an experiment today. Watch the people around you. Is the most effective person the one who talks about what she's going to do or the person who simply does it? Is the person others value, the one who listens most or talks most? In my mission of helping in midlife divorce recovery, I talk. I speak. I write. A lot. But today, I am going to be more conscious of not talking unless I really have something to say. I think that exercise is good for all of us.

"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, ..."
James 1:19